Ridiculous

I made a pot of broc and cheddar soup but something is missing – I can’t tell what it is.  It makes me so mad.  The first time I made it, I thought it was delicious – almost Panera Bread quality but not quite.  Since then, even though I do exactly the same thing, it never turns out how I want.  Sometimes I wonder why I even try.  My son believes it is the crock pot but I don’t know why that would make a difference.  He cooks his soups in a soup pot on the stove.  Maybe the crock pot isn’t getting it hot enough fast enough so the ingredients don’t blend as well? I have no idea…that is just a guess.

It is time for bed now – 3:30 am and I would be just getting home from work had I gone there tonight.  My throat feels better but I think that Tylenol medicine is playing havoc with my stomach now. 

Talked to my son on the phone for about thirty minutes.  He is having relationship issues still which can get him pretty down.  We are still going out tomorrow before work so that will be good. 

Right now he has two girls pursuing him – one his age and one much younger.  He isn’t ready to date either yet – the one his age is fine with that but the younger one is very emotional which comes with immaturity.  She had it all built up in her mind that my son would get out of his other relationship of four+ years – go out with her once or twice and be ready to get married.  She says she has been in love with him for over a year now.  Well, that just doesn’t fly with my son who is still trying to get over the last one that broke his heart.  I think he will probably have a chat with the younger one and let her down easy – she has a lot of growing up to do.

I was talking via instant message to a friend of mine in Florida who is also having relationship issues.  Her boyfriend has decided he must move home to Texas to be near his father because his brother came to Florida for a visit and made him feel guilty for living so far away.  I guess their mother is dead so the father is alone except for his other three children who still leave in the same city as he does.  I don’t know if her boyfriend is the youngest and that is why he feels so guilty or what. 

Anyway, it is tearing apart my friend because she would go with him to TX in a heartbeat but he won’t let her.  He sees her beautiful house (with pool) and all the things she has built for herself there in Florida and doesn’t want to be the reason she leaves someplace she so obviously loves.  She is originally from Texas though so moving back there would not be a horrible sacrifice to her.  She hates her job and just wants to be with him.  I don’t understand how something can be “right” if it causes both people to be miserable and unhappy. 

So here I sat for several hours tonight dishing out relationship advice when I, myself, am not in one.  Not only am I not in one, but I have little desire to be  in one ever again.  There is so much drama and problems in marriages, dating and romantic relationships.  Part of it is that I’m selfish.  I don’t want the hassles of having to consider another person’s schedule, feelings, wishes, ethics, etc.  Sure sometimes it would be nice to have someone to do things with, get dressed up for a nice romantic dinner, and have sex with – but overall, these things are no longer all that important in the big scheme of things.  It isn’t that I still wouldn’t like to have it but I’m at the point in my life that if it doesn’t happen then that is alright too.