Only Time…

I have that song in my head by Enya – don’t know why.  That reminds me, I need to charge my mp3 player for my trip tomorrow.  My son is also charging his AND he is bringing his laptop so that will be good.  I doubt he’ll get a wireless signal out in the country of my sister’s house but he can get one probably most of the way there.

Bennie has been driving me nuts.  I let him inside and he whines to go out – put him out and he stands at the door whining to come in…I obviously am not understanding what it is he wants.  I think he likes the idea of outside until he goes out and finds it is wet, then he wants to come back in.  I don’t want to walk them – the worms will be out again.

I’m trying to load things up for tomorrow.  It is 35 outside so I could even put the pies out in the car and they’d stay cold enough but I won’t.  I’m putting a big note on the door so I won’t walk off and forget them.  I’m suppose to take the tv and dvd player down so the boys have something to watch while the adults visit – I forgot how heavy that damn tv was.  Man I love my flat screen – even if it is smaller than my son’s.  It sure is sharp and beautiful.

Was planning on starting Christmas cards yet tonight – plus I need to finish rearranging furniture but will not mess with that since it is so late – don’t want to wake my neighbors.  Besides, I really think my patience is all used up for tonight and moving furniture is usually something that tests it when it is fully charged.  I almost always hurt my toes even though I’m wearing shoes.  Should have gased the car today – didn’t even thing about it.

When did banks stop providing envelopes at their night drop and outside ATM? That was very annoying.  I had something to deposit and had no envelope – I finally wrote my account number on the check and dumped it in the night drop – irritates me.

Have to be up by 8:30am to be on the road around 9:30 to make it to my sisters by Noon.  Will have to pick up my son and we will have to stop to get coffee somewhere and gas…preferrably at the same place to save stops.  Think I might walk the dogs and go to bed…all the rest of this stuff is going to be here waiting for me when I get home tomorrow evening.  Man, I’m exhausted.

On a cool note, my train does go around the tree, disappearing behind the presents to re-emerge on the other side.  It plays Christmas music if I want it to – I love it but I must say, it wrecks a lot! I imagine because of the carpet.  I love having a full size tree again too – it is lovely.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING, world.  May each day be full of love and health!

Oh yeah, I’m actually looking better on my NaNo – think I’m about even with what I should have for today. 

Aye Maties

My sister informed me that I’ve been home all day and haven’t written a new post so here it goes:

I have been rearranging furniture to make room for the Christmas tree, presents, and train on the floor in front of the window.  It has not been easy and my lower back is really hurting.  I am going to shower and run into town because I have to go to Target and who knows, maybe my son and I will go get soup but then again, we are spending all day together tomorrow so he might not want to.  Doesn’t matter to me cuz I’m going to get the gate I need at Target to keep the dogs away from the tree and then come home to put it up tonight.  I’m anxious and this weather makes it seem like a good time.

I still have more furniture to move but am ready for a break from that.  The dogs are in the kennel but not happy about it however, with everything I had to move, things that weren’t dog friendly had to be put down on the floor.  Last thing I need is for Bennie to chew up my new tennis shoes or one of the presents…I just can’t trust him.

Am going to drive down to my sister’s house tomorrow for Thanksgiving.  We are excited about going down there – she is a great cook.  We will visit awhile then head home about 3pm to try to get back before it gets too dark.  Headlights bother my eyes so I’d probably end up with a migraine if I had to travel a long distance with lights glaring in my face.

Last week the weather was really great on my days off – took the dogs to the dog park twice.  Looks like that might have been the last hurrah for the year – bummer. 

Received a short note from my friend in Florida – she is doing pretty good and hopes to be back to work in February.  She is undergoing chemo for liver cancer.  She said the chemo wipes her out for days.  Hope she gets better soon so we can go on a singles cruise to pick up some guys…what happens on a cruise ship, stays on a cruise ship. 

Well, I need to get moving to get some stuff done.  Sorry sis, most of this I already wrote to you in an email so I’m sure you won’t be too thrilled to read my post but don’t have much else to say.  I am about 4,000 words behind on Nano…plan on being up later typing on it.  It is going to be some feat though if I make it to 50,000 by the deadline. 

After Midnight Again

Well, I’ve spent hours typing and working on my story.  As of a few minutes ago, I am still almost 4,000 words behind BUT I am more confident I can catch up now.  The story is moving a little bit faster again but still has such a long way to go.  Part of me wishes it was done already because I’m sick of it.  I’ve never stayed this long with only one story since I wrote Siren’s Song over six years ago.  Usually I write on one until I’m bored and then go to another one – which is probably one reason I don’t have any finished or near to being finished.

The story is so very rough and unsophisticated – no way it could ever be ready to publish without major rewrites from beginning to end.  However, that wasn’t really my intention when I decided to do NaNo for the first time.  Of course it would have been great to have a story that just wrote itself like Siren’s Song did but the challenge I issued to myself was to actually get the words in and meet the deadline.  I have never had a deadline before or a set number of words – I must admit that the number of words makes me stressed but it isn’t a bad stress necessarily.  It is more feeling like I need to write and sometimes I just don’t feel like writing a damn thing. 

This contest has been good for me and hopefully will help my writing career…if I ever actually have a writing career.  I do think the writing part is looking better after this exercise but am still skeptical about the publishing part as a whole.  My first love is Siren’s Song – I suppose because it is the first full length novel I’ve ever completed.  People who have read it believe that it is publishable but I don’t know.  It would be mind-boggling to even try to figure out how to begin pursuing publishing.  I know that sounds lame but it is true.  I’ve been going through the writer’s market and the literary agent books – it is not easy to figure out what the jumping off point should be.

Where my writing is concerned, I’m too much like my mother I guess.  She never thought her writing was good enough to publish either though many of us disagreed.  I would love to have her story published – it would require a ghost writer who could follow her simple style so the reader wouldn’t see where Mom’s writing ended and the ghost writer’s began.  Not too many people want to be a ghost writer who doesn’t get any of the credit.  I would finish Mom’s book but I don’t think I could – it is a western and I honestly don’t have the interest in that genre to do hers justice.  Still, wish someone would as it would be awesome to see her name on a published book posthumously. 

Well, anyway, I need to go walk the dogs and then get to bed.  It is 12:30am and will be 1am before I can actually relax in bed so need to get moving.  Tomorrow is going to be a stressful day of training.  Training isn’t bad if the trainee and myself are alone in dispatch but tensions rise as more people get added to the mix.  Ugh.  My trainee is doing really well though so that is a big plus.

Way too tired…Way too late

It is almost midnight – way past my bedtime.  I have to be up in 5.5 hours to go work a hellish 12 hour shift.  I don’t look forward to it at all.  Sunday I work another 12 with just my trainee – that will be very interesting.  I wonder if she works tomorrow too? We will have to have her step meeting tomorrow instead of Sunday since I found out my cohort is taking Sunday off.

I don’t know who will take my trainee on the days I’ve requested off – I know it is bad of me to take time off when I have a trainee but it is necessary.  Ugh.  I have such a headache.

Have been writing but am still almost 10,000 words behind.  I have felt like writing tonight but I have to go to bed now so I can’t keep going.  I’m going to take my laptop to work tomorrow just in case we get a quiet moment so I can write.  Plus I will get off at 7pm so maybe I’ll go get soup at Panera and work on my story there.

My younger sister invited my son and myself to her house for Thanksgiving as we didn’t have any major plans.  Plus she has a table for me so I want to pick it up.  I so can’t wait until my apartment is in order.  I really could use some nice art but oh well.  Still, her giving me that table and two chairs leaves me with just a dresser and headboard left to get.  I also want a library table but that will wait till Spring since I need the space right now for other things.  I’m going to get everything all situated right in time to move elsewhere.  Oh what joy.

That is why my coworker is taking off Sunday – they have someone subletting their apartment so they have to be out by Tuesday and they don’t have a new apartment yet so they are scrambling.  I’m sure they will find something by then.  How awful to have to rush so much to get moved though.  I hope I have at least a couple weeks when I decide to move.

Well, anyway, I need to go to bed.  Hope everyone has a great weekend!

Partly Cloudy with Rays of Sun

The sun is shining but every time I get excited about it, it goes back behind the clouds.  I’m hoping it will find its way to stay out here in a bit.  I need to walk the dogs and it is a much better experience if the sun is shining.   

Today I am getting the Christmas tree and stuff.  I know, I’m rushing it but I don’t care – it is the first time I’ve looked forward to Christmas in over a decade.  Why? I have no idea but I’m not going to question a good thing.  Usually Christmas makes me so depressed that I just want to hide until it is over.  This year I have to rein myself in so I don’t overdue it with silly things like lawn blow-up things and what not. 

I did buy a train set – did I post about that already? I hope it comes today or tomorrow.  It is a Christmas train set that goes around the bottom of the tree.  However, I was thinking I might put it up on a table and buy all the little Christmas village things like I use to see every Christmas at the Shell Factory.  I doubt I’ll have the money to go that far but now that I have the train, I can start collecting the village stuff cuz there is a lot of it to choose from.  I can make my very own perfect little town.

I didn’t go to bed last night until 4am but I slept in my bed so slept right through till 10am when my alarm went off.  That was awesome though I don’t think the dogs enjoyed being in the kennel.  I’m thinking I might use the outdoor leashes to leash them inside so they can still roam around but not get to the things I worry about them tearing up.  I do it now and then when I’m working on something on the floor and want to keep it out of their reach – they seem to like it fine as it still gives them a lot more movement ability than the kennel.

I need to get going I guess, the dogs are giving me their “oh sorrow” look and the sun has actually stayed out for almost a full 5 minutes!  I love the sun – it makes everything so bright (ha, ha) and cheery. 

Can’t wait to get my presents all wrapped to go under the tree.   

 On a sad note, I am so far behind on NaNo now that I don’t know if I’m going to be able to catch up.    It is hard to write when the holidays are here – should do this in October.  Maybe next year I will write it in October for November.  I’m going to try to catch up but with just about every day filled up with something between now and the end of the month, it isn’t looking promising.

Crazy

“It rather bothers me that my future use doing terrible now that I have the microphone.”  That sentence was done with voice recognition – it was suppose to say “It really bothers me that the computer is doing terrible now even though I have the microphone.”  I probably need to go back and retrain it now that I have them but so far I’ve been very unimpressed with its abilities.  According to the be promotions for the software, it is supposed to be so wonderful.

Got my hair cut today – I really like it.  It is short but not too short – I just couldn’t take it anymore.  Spent the afternoon from about 4pm until 10pm with my son – we had a good time.  I must say though, going to Best Buy with him is never a ‘quick” thing.  We end up spending hours there.  My feet are killing me, they hurt so bad.  It isn’t just the bottoms of my feet but my calves too.  I told my son that shopping with him is a big workout for me.

I am pretty much done with my Christmas shopping – this is the earliest I’ve ever had it done in my entire life…seriously.  Tomorrow I am going to Walmart to get the tree and ornaments – then I am putting that stuff up, wrapping the gifts and getting them under the tree.  I have to buy a gate of some kind to keep the dogs away from it though as I can imagine Bennie will try to eat the tree, presents or both.

The dogs want me to take them on a walk and I know that I need to but damn, my feet hurt so bad.  It is almost 2am and I should be getting in bed but I drank so much coffee today to keep up with my son that I don’t know that I will be able to fall asleep very soon.

I bought Christmas music and movies today to try to help keep me in the holiday spirit.  I’ve been working very hard on that this year.  Have Christmas with the Kranks, It’s a Wonderful Life (B&W/Color), and the Grinch.  I need to get Scrooged yet.  I have National Lampoon’s Christmas, Home Alone, and Home from the Holidays from last year.  Can’t think of others I will spend the money on but I suppose a few might come up.

I have furniture to rearrange this week.  I’ve decided to buy a cheap table and chairs because I can’t find a set I like but I want one for the holidays.  Hope we have a white Christmas!

Dictation

Today has been a busy day.  Have been learning voice activation software which has been a challenge.  I have been reading to my computer so that it can learn my voice and the way I speak.  It was doing much better at work than it is doing at home. 

It’s been like trying to teach a child to read.  I don’t have a microphone so it has been getting a lot of background noise. 

The computer typed the above part – it took it twenty minutes because it couldn’t understand most of what I said.  I should have bought the microphone in CVS but I had already ordered the recommended one for arrival on Thursday or Friday.  It is very frustrating when the computer doesn’t get what I’m saying – at work it did so much better but I didn’t have the tv on, the clock ticking so loudly or the ceiling fan rotating. 

I have to be to work tomorrow at 7am which doesn’t thrill me as this was the time I was suppose to be able to sleep in.  I have a class called “Active Shooter” which is for dispatchers of universities so we will know what to do if a student goes postal.  Others have gone to it and said it is pretty good but I’m not really into the whole idea.  Why? Because I don’t think they can teach every scenerio and that each instance is unique and, therefore, unpredictable.  To say one class can teach us what to do is rather far reaching since every dispatch center has their own layout, command structure, and rules.  However, it probably will be somewhat interesting.

I didn’t get my writing done for today and I don’t feel like doing it tonight either.  Hopefully I can get off early tomorrow to catch up.  The story is at a standstill so I will have to figure out what happens next.  I don’t think the story is that good – it will need major rewriting before it could ever be sent to a critiquing service even.

The apartment is very cold this evening – I need to turn on the heater I guess.  I suppose I will turn on the humidifier too.  If I can get off early, I will see if my won wants to go for soup and coffee.  I’m not sure if he has to work tomorrow or not but I think he does.

Anyway, I need to get moving and get a few things done before I have to be in bed in 45 minutes.  I sure hope I don’t wake up again in a few hours – that gets so very old. 

It is weird, now that I’ve been talking to my computer it seems like it should be typing all this as I compose it in my head.  At work I kept trying to tell the computer what to do too, forgetting that it my laptop was more sophisticated than the desktop models.

I went the last two hours with my belt undone at work – no one said a thing and I didn’t realize it until I was untucking my shirt as I was leaving.  How embarrassing.  Man I have to lose weight.  I need to get this whole sleep thing down so I can exercise more.  Ugh.

Life Uncommon

It is almost 11 am and I’m hanging out at home cleaning.  Got most of the kitchen done so that is one thing off my list.  I’m in a funky mood today thus far – not sure why.  Might go shop at Houseworks to see if I can find a kitchen table and chairs.  If I can’t find one there then I will hit the IC Stuff Inc though I think their prices are outrageous.  If nothing there then I’ll go back to the Coralville Stuff Inc and get the table I looked at last week – it didn’t come with any kitchen chairs which irritated me but was thinking I could get folding chairs for now if I have to.

Made breakfast – sausages, eggs and toast.  Ate the a couple sausage links, one egg and one slice of toast – the dogs are eating the rest.  My stomach feels so upset, I don’t understand it.  As I told my sister, I think the medicine I started yesterday is causing it but hard to say because I took it over 13 hours ago so you’d think the effects would have worn off by now.

I’m going to take the dogs to the dog park again today if it warms up some – suppose to be in the 50’s today.  The sky looks like it is thinking about snowing – thankfully it is too warm for that stuff.

Why is it the day I’m hoping for a package, the UPS and FedEx men are late? They are almost always here between 10-11am but no sight of them today.  I don’t buy that they are busier because of the holiday yesterday…they wouldn’t have had packages delivered to the warehouses either till today.  I know the minute I leave with the dogs they will come.  UPS will leave a package but FedEx won’t.  I have packages coming through both of them I believe.  Need to buy some Christmas wrapping paper so I can wrap them up.  I’m very excited about the gifts I got my son so far – I hope he will like them a lot.

I need to get my sister’s birthday present ready to be mailed too.  I hope she likes it.

Darn I feel so blue today, it started last evening – got better when I was writing – but now is back full force.  I don’t know what is up with it but I don’t like feeling this way.  Maybe part of it is that I’m listening to Charley Pride who my Mom loved and it is making me think of her.

One of my friends in Florida commented on Facebook today that she is so thankful for her 80-year-old mother who still goes out dancing several times a week in high heels, volunteers at the hospital and is so loving towards her family.  It makes me want my Mom and once again feel like I got the short end of the stick because she died way too young leaving her adult children to fend for themselves.  Face it, we all need our moms to be there for us – to give advice, to share things past, to make the holidays special.

In Florida I found a friend of mine’s mom was just fantastic – I really enjoyed being around them.  I can’t explain it but I took to her immediately and could have attached more long-term as her surrogate daughter but then she died too.  Makes me sad.  Oh well.  No point dwelling on it.

I wish my son would fall in love with someone who made his heart sing, that they would get married, have a few children and live happily ever after.  I don’t want him to settle for someone who doesn’t fill his heart with love and fear he will because he thinks he is getting older.  He expected to be married at 24 and having kids by 28 – he is 30 and has done neither but I tell him that is better than the alternative.  Who would want to be stuck in a loveless relationship and have kids to deal with?

Oh well. I need to get moving here and do something before I drown in the past.

 

Shopping

My son and I spent nearly the entire day shopping.  We started at the Coralridge Mall around 2pm and quit at 10pm – I’m exhausted.  We had a most excellent time even though neither of us bought a lot.  It was fun to browse and get ideas for Christmas.

It is 4am now and I’m going to bed.  I know this isn’t a long post but I am totally exhausted.  Am going out to look for a kitchen table tomorrow – I’m excited about it. 

Day Off Went Fast

My day of vacation went fast I must say.  Went in and picked up my son for lunch.  He took me to the steakhouse which was nice.  I was planning on taking him but he had a gift certificate so we used that.  It was delicious as usual.

We had a good talk about his plans for the future and the things we needed to get done – such as, he needs to get to the dentist for a filling that came out and I need to get new tires for the car.  I really should go to the dentist as well but will refrain until I really need to cuz that is the kind of person I am.

Went and started to get groceries but ended up having that pain again so cut that short – only got a few things.  Came home and have been playing on the internet whenever I get the chance – the darn thing keeps crashing on me.  I have no idea what has kept me occupied for this long – got home about 7:30pm and here it is 11pm.  What have I been doing?? Was looking at Christmas music, looking at books, researching tv’s as I need a new one but don’t want to spend a lot of money.  I have a 27″ right now but will probably have to replace it with a 20″ because I want a flat screen and the 20″ is about all I can afford.

I’m working on my writing project for the month – had 3700 words done as of yesterday – not sure yet how many I have today as I hand wrote them out so have to type them into the computer.  I didn’t want to take my laptop with me into town so used a spiral instead.  My son laughs at me because I seatbelt my laptop in…doesn’t everyone? If I have to stop suddenly or am in an accident, I don’t want my laptop getting slammed around. 

Realized when I got to the store that I hadn’t put the reusable bags in the car so I bought four more – I swear I have over a dozen of them now.  Maybe I’ll see if Wayne wants a few.  They really hold a lot of stuff and are nice because they don’t break.  I string a bungee cord through all the handles when I put them in the trunk and then secure the cord to the little handles for the back seat – that way none of the bags fall over spilling stuff…its great!

Well, anyway, hope everyone is having a good Tuesday!