Here I am Again

Just spent the past 3 hours customizing and playing with my website. I don’t really like the new dashboard they have but not much I can do about it. Why do they think they have to change things just for the sake of change? There is nothing new on the new dashboard - and the old one was working just fine…I don’t get it. I don’t mind change but if there is no reason for it other then for some programmer to show off - then why do it?

I had to change my screen because, since they played with the site, my webpage was all out of whack. The only way I could find to fix it was moving to a new design. Then a person has to get the new design customized…gives a person a headache.

Went to the library earlier and got five more books. I would have ended up with more but the library was closing so they were in a rush for me to checkout. The checkout clerk was not polite either - guess she was uptight that I waited till they were less then five minutes away from closing before I brought my selections up. I would have self-checked but that machine fails to read my library card more often then not. Frustrating.

Have I mentioned lately how glad I am to be home? It still hits me strange when I try to remember where the mall and restaurants are that I want to go to. I imagine I’ll get adjusted to it as time goes on. When I read the paper it is full of what is happening here in Iowa…and I have to remind myself that is because I am here…in Iowa. LOL. I expect to see articles on things to do with Florida.

It is going on midnight and while I don’t want to go to bed, I do think I will have to go here shortly. I am pretty tired and want to get up early tomorrow. Need to start thinking bout what I’m going to get my sister for her birthday next month…gives me an excuse to go out to the mall later this week.

One more 7am-3pm - then I’m done and get to go to evenings! Hooray!!!! Sure wish they’d just leave me on 3-11pm or 11pm-7am…hate the day shift.

Whatever…

Today was an OK day - not all that great but not horrible either. It gave me a very bad headache though. Really am not looking forward to the next five days. I sure can’t wait to go to evenings.

The kids went out for chicken wings - I don’t really like them so I ate McDonald’s instead. I put in the movie “Ghost Rider” but really couldn’t stand it after the first fifteen minutes so changed it to Boat Trip. I don’t know if it will be any better but I really like Cuba Gooding Jr and he is in it.

Sorry that this is short folks - I don’t seem to get a lot of computer time these days.

Merry Christmas, Mom

“Merry Christmas, Mom” is a phrase I haven’t been able to say to my mother for over a decade. You’d be surprised how such simple things like that can elicit such strong emotions. It’s Christmas time and I wish I had the opportunity to talk to Mom just one more time. But the sands in the hourglass have shifted closing that chapter of my life forever.

I have some bad memories of my childhood, yes, but they seem to have faded into the archive vault in my head - no longer able to hurt me.

Most of my memories now are from the more fun things we’d do - like UFO watching. If you haven’t read “Advantages of…”’s post “Midnight” from 6/28/06, about our UFO adventures, I highly recommend it. You can find a link to his site under “blogroll” on the right of the screen.

I remember searching the paper for disasters - pretty much any kind as long as it was on a grand scale. Finding one for Mom to read to me was a real treat. Yes, I know how that sounds but Mom like disasters and her reading them or telling me about them was one of the few moments we felt really connected.

I’d ask questions about why earthquakes, avalanches, mud slides, etc., happened and she’d tell me to look it up in the encyclopedias we had. If I needed more information, the school library was also an excellent resource. Thus my love of research was born - I loved finding answers to all my questions.

I miss how Mom would laugh - always with her hand covering her mouth as if she was afraid it might explode from her uncontrollably. The real reason, of course, was her embarrassment over the way her teeth looked but we never cared.

I remember nights of cowering on the couch together as we watched another terrifying episode of “Creature Feature” or “Twilight Zone.”

We’d also be found on the couch when episodes of National Geographic would come on about Jacques Cousteu or the great mysteries of the world. Mom and I would try to figure out what great scientists couldn’t - like the theory of Atlantis, the disappearances in the Bermuda Triangle, and how the stones came to be at Easter Island. Of course, the more outlandish the reasoning, the more fun it was.

We’d look at travel books - marveling at the majestic mountains, the Painted Desert, the Grand Canyon and the clear blueness of the oceans. We’d talk about how “someday” we’d see it all.

Of course I could go on and on. Her love of reading and writing inspired the same in her children. She also enjoyed drawing along with an artist on TV and even took a few art classes. She was good though she didn’t think so. That trait was not something, unfortunately, that was passed on to me though I try my hand at it every now and then - trying to will the creative juices within to flow onto the canvas. It never works.

For those of you who really know me, reading this post will make you smile. You’ll realize why I love to go out at night with my telescope to gaze at the stars, why I’m fascinated by the cause of disasters, and a whole slew of other “strange” interests I have…like scary movies.

I am a combobulation of my past - a dim reflection of all the good things my Mom shared with me. We are all, whether we like it or not, a shadow of our mothers to some degree.

I wish I could tell my Mom one more time how much she meant to me and how much I still miss her after all these years. “Merry Christmas, Mom.”

Monsters

After spending several days bemoaning the fact that there is a real deficiency of scary books and/or movies, I’ve decided to see if I can write one myself. I want a book that is so taut with tension and scary that I’m afraid to read it after its written.

Really, aren’t we all kind of getting sick of vampires, werewolves, and the walking dead? Not, of course, that I’d miss seeing “Resident Evil 3” - it’s a classic. I also hope “30 days of nights” is good. Maybe that is because we haven’t had a good monster movie in awhile.

I long for a real “monster” movie and/or book. One that doesn’t involve genetic testing, humans transformed to monsters like in “Doom” and “Cave“, etc. I’d like one like “Deep Rising” … just a good, old fashioned monster movie.

I don’t know if I can write such a thing - I really have no ideas so far - but hey, it never hurts to give it a whirl.