Groceries – hate spending the money

Went and got groceries at Fareway.  I absolutely hated spending the money but as there was literally nothing in the house to eat but PB&J, I figured I should.  Now, $100 poorer, I look at my list – note the items I forgot – and sigh.  I’m not going back again for at least another week so am going to have to do without those things until then.

It is only 65 degrees outside but there is no breeze and the humidity is way up there.  I have windows open but it is so hot in my apartment that I sweat just sitting here.  I am tempted to turn back on the air conditioner but I don’t want to if I can do without it.

My mood, as the day wears on, is only getting worse and I’m not sure why.  I suppose because I still have a list of cleaning to do and no ambition to do it.  What is wrong with me?  My apartment needs attention but yet I have no desire to clean it.  It wouldn’t even take that long to clean it – the dusting is pretty much done so it would be vacuuming, sweeping, cleaning the bathroom and doing laundry.

I want it to storm – seriously storm.  I want thunder that makes the windows rattle and lightning streaks that race across the sky as if the sky itself was cracking open.  Maybe I should read – it seems to take my mind off things for a while.  I need to walk over to the laundromat to see if the washer and dryers are free too.  I should start the laundry.

If I’m going to do laundry, I should also do the curtains and bed-clothes.  Lord knows they need it again but that means three loads instead of one.  Maybe I should do one load today and one load tomorrow – then see how I feel about doing another one the next day.  But why prolong the agony?  Maybe I should take a nap – or maybe I should drink some caffeine…sigh.  I hate days like this.  I don’t feel right but yet can’t pinpoint what is wrong either.


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